Wednesday, March 25, 2015

All OR Nothing

It's been 3 months since i left my blog dead
And FYI; it's my longest period..
Idk why but the reason why is because I've lost the motivation of blogging.
Since nobody bothers to read it anyways.
Hahah but i still blog for the sake of memories.
I want to blog about my current life so that,
in the near future, (when i'm bored) ; i will look through and thought "Oh i did this when i was 16"
Hah, it's kind lame but it would be meaningful as the time goes.
Because you will never be able to keep track of time.
You can wait for the time to pass but Time don't stop just because you want it to.
So in short, the world don't revolve around You .
Life goes on no matter what...

When you were young, you genuinely wished to be older .
But when you were older, you wanted to be young so badly.
Sadly; life is full of irony and you have to live with it.
I just couldn't believe that I'll be turning 20 this year.
And i thought to myself " What have I accomplished over the past 20 years?"
People would be like, oh that's easy .
[I've achieved 1st place for academic results when I was p5]
And as for me?

Yes, nothing (for now)
So i made a pact to myself when i was 16.
I told myself that i will earn my first $10k before i reach 21; all by myself.
That explains totally why i am working like a sloth not because i want to;
Note: There's a difference of want / must
As my family's tradition is all about being independent; can you choose not to work?
Hah, come to think of it- I've been taking 2 jobs ever since i entered poly.
And maybe, I'm turning to a workaholic whom i never knew i would become.

I've received my academic results.
And i got a shock of my life due to NYP's personal message.
Little did i know, NYP eventually sent a text to my phone to inform my grades.
Well, i didn't expect them to lend a helping hand when i don't need it LOL
Seriously, I almost died of a broken heart when i saw a C in my grade.
Well apparently, the module was not graded so i don't understand why NYP has to include in it-.-
Honestly, i had high hopes for this sem's results.
And yup, it wasn't the best i foresee but at least, there's an improvement.
Just in short, i'm still disappointed...
Blame it on my overconfidence or complacency, yea the feeling sucks.
Like the feeling that you thought you can ACE it and boom, HAH YOU CAN'T GET IT.
So i tell myself as a reminder,
I will do even better for my last sem.
For the sake of myself
For the sake of my future
I will work extra harder this time.
Say goodbye to my complacency, laziness
I'm giving out ALL or nothing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Sorry i need this self- encouragement to salvage my broken heart.
Don't mind me,
Till then :)

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